全地球の生き物は虫

It's time.....

to face.....

THE INSECT!

Japan is full of bugs. So much so in fact that you wouldn't be blamed for just staying indoors 24/7, with your feet of the floor and all the windows shut. There's crawly ones, slimy ones, flappy ones and even jumpy ones, each annoying and creepy in their own way.

But I think my 3 least favourite that i've seen so far are as follows!



3. Cicada　セミ

These horrible tree bugs are the somewhat iconic sound of summer in Japan. That is if you enjoy the relaxing background music of buzz saw crossed with dial up internet. They live underground for most of the year as mini child bugs and then when the heat of the suns rays warms their manky bodies they pop up to the surface to annoy everybody and shed skin everywhere.

Damn am I getting fat?

2. Stink bug　カメムシ

These bugs are like my sister, green and eat rotting food out of bins. Well not just bins actually, any delectable piece of mouldy garbage is like a 5 star restaurant for this green buggers. So basically they have a hoover on the front of their faces and suck all the extra juicy rot juice from inside the food and this sits in their belly for the next forever. This means if you squash them or even sometimes just shove them off your items all the stink comes out and contaminates the immediate vicinity with lingering grossness.

look at it, pretending to be a normal bug.

1. Giant hornet　スズメバチ
Quickly everybody, get indoors, get into the bunker, hide your budgerigar, the hornets are coming and they are ANGRY!!! In summery, these are the worst; so bad I even named my blog after them. (But now, I am saddened deep down into my core to tell you.... I saw a hornet. My blog title is redundant. For shame.) Fact is, these stingy monstrosities live all over Japan and this includes in random bushes around Tokyo, as such is there prevalence they claim over 40 lives a year. But as if the sting isn't bad enough, if you catch them on a day where they went to the shop but it was out of milk, they also spray you in the eyes with flesh melting toxins... signal the rest of the swarming hive to hunt you down. You don't get stung by these, you get stabbed.

He mad.

EXTRA CONTENT: I also don't like it when i'm casaully walking down the road in the glow of midday, and all of a sudden the sky goes dark as the sun is put into eclipse by the gigantiuan wingspan of what I call 'demon-hummingbird-flapper'. I call it as such because google did not provide me a name, so we can only presume its lack of internet existence is because it came STRAIGHT FROM HELL! It's body is fully black and when it flies directly into my face unexpectedly I swear it's wings have power akin to a jet engine or two. Ok, maybe i'm exaggerating a little... but when I see a big-ass bug, this is still me:

I'm just going to go weld my windows shut. Bye guys!